Lucy Letby: The handwritten messages found in her bedroom

Densely written messages on a few sheets of paper were found during police searches at the former Countess of Chester Hospital neonatal unit nurse's Westbourne Road home, and at the workplace at the hospital’s risk and patient safety office.

Handwritten messages uncovered at Lucy Letby's home in July 2018. Pictures: Cheshire Constabulary/CPS. (Image: Crown Prosecution Service.)

Letby was moved by health chiefs to the hospital’s risk and patient safety office after consultants raised concerns about her “common link” to numerous collapses of patients at the unit.

Handwritten messages uncovered at Lucy Letby's home in July 2018. Pictures: Cheshire Constabulary/CPS.

She denies murdering seven babies and attempting to murder 10 others between June 2015 and June 2016.

The messages were shown to the jury on Monday, April 17, and some of the handwritten messages found at her home have now been made available by the Crown Prosecution Service and Cheshire Constabulary. Some of the messages have been blurred to protect the identity of people who cannot be named in the trial.

Handwritten messages uncovered at Lucy Letby's home in July 2018. Pictures: Cheshire Constabulary/CPS.

They are in addition to the note which was shown to the jury in the first week of the trial.

Prosecutor Philip Astbury said three handwritten notes were recovered by police from one of the handbags.

Handwritten messages uncovered at Lucy Letby's home in July 2018. Pictures: Cheshire Constabulary/CPS.

The notes contained closely written words which filled the pages and included declarations of love for a doctor colleague, who cannot be identified for legal reasons.

Next to his name was “I loved you” and “my best friend”.

Written several times is the phrase: 'Love was all we needed but time let us down'.

Handwritten messages uncovered at Lucy Letby's home in July 2018. Pictures: Cheshire Constabulary/CPS.

Also contained in the notes were the words “Help Me”, “I Can’t Do This Any More” and “How Can Life Be This Way”.

Mr Astbury said a green Post-it note, shown to jurors at the start of Letby’s trial, was found inside the diary.

Part of the note read “I don’t deserve to live. I killed them on purpose because I’m not good enough to care for them”, “I am a horrible evil person” and in capital letters “I am evil I did this”.

A handwritten note found at Lucy Letby's home in her 2016 diary, shown to the jury in the first week of her trial. Picture: Cheshire Constabulary/CPS.

In his opening speech, Ben Myers KC, defending, told jurors the Post-it note was the “anguished outpouring of a young woman”.

He added Letby was at the time “in fear and despair when she realises the enormity of what’s being said about her, in the moment, to herself”.

Further messages were uncovered in police searches – one in a black bin bag at Letby's home on June 10, 2019, the other at her workplace in 2018.

Phrases on the note found in the black bin bag included “killing me softly”, “broken hearted” and “no-one will ever know what happened or why”.

In a drawer at the hospital’s risk and patient safety office, where Letby had been working, an annual leave request form from Letby, dated 2017 and covered with untidily written jumbled words, was found in a blue folder of papers.

Hearts were doodled on the form along with random words “Tigger”, “Smudge”, “Bergerac” and “Help Me”.

Sentences scrawled across the form included “I trusted you with everything and loved you”, “I really can’t do this any more, I just want life to be as it was,” “I want to be happy in the job that I loved…. really don’t belong anywhere, I’m a problem to those who do know me and it would be much easier for everyone if I just went away”.

The trial is expected to continue tomorrow (Wednesday, April 19).